Today I participated in the high school version of Show and Tell - my little brother brought me into his religion class to discuss college with the Junior boys. Besides being the only girl in an all boy's Catholic School, the experience wasn't too scarring...besides being stared down until I got within the ten feet range, then I noticed no one made eye contact with me.
I did get asked to Prom though - cute! I almost said yes...I want to go to prom! I want to have an excuse to wear a dress (Besides military ball...yeesh.) and do my hair and nails and take pictures. And I want to slow dance. I have no excuse to slow dance anymore and that's my absolute favorite. A lot of people hate it because it can be awkward but luckily all my dates in HS were EXCELLENT dancers and I got to be the girl spinning and dipping on the dance floor...ahhh so much fun. I would give anything just for one Michael Buble song on a high school dance floor.
I really wish I would have soaked up the whole awkward moment thing when my date came to the door and gave me flowers (the absolute best was when one brought me yellow and orange roses..love that!) Mom hovered and dad stared with that sour puss look on his face..and I knew he was thinking about his extensive gun collection down in the basement. Oh the good old days. I guess I just miss when boys got nervous and twitchy and stuttered instead of stumbling over drunk and grabbing the girl's butt.
I remember the first time I got asked to a HS dance. My friend Tommy from Kindergarden called me (On my house phone!) and it took him about twenty minutes to actually get up the courage to ask me. And of course I tried to hide my excitement - FAIL - and I danced around my house for weeks. It was really cute because we used to play the Lion King together in my basement when we were six, and the next thing I know he's bringing me to Homecoming.
And then there was my first real highschool boyfriend - which was an even bigger reason to dance around. His name was Eric he was on the football team, the relationship lasted two weeks and I'm pretty sure I saw him once during that time, it was really special.
My first REAL highschool boyfriend was Scott, he was a catch. I adored him, as in worshipped him. He was the first boy I really thought I was in love with, like the real love kind. He taught me everything I know, I really owe him a big thank you. He was very patient with my antics. College eventually broke us up but I think your first "real" love is something you can never fully let go.
Similar to that is your first kiss. Of course I will always completely adore the boy who gave me my first real kiss - hi Ian =)
I think overall I have a damn good track record for boyfriends - or maybe the midwest just doesn't raise bad ones. I'm still friends with all of them and I actually don't have one guy I've dated that I still don't look back fondly on. I've never had a bad break up, things just didn't end up working out in the end - and that's okay, too. From each one I learned something different and from each one I found something else that is important for me in a relationship... and it all led me to my current boyfriend who is, pardon my Southern terminology but, the absolute bees knees and practically perfect in every way...at least for me, and from him I learned another thing: There are good boys outside of the Midwest/South! Who knew?
Honestly though, today actually just made me feel SUPER old. I remember swooning over the senior boys in High school, and now? If you would have asked me I would have told you most of the boys were 12. I guess puberty is regressing.
They asked the cutest questions though! All the normal ones about relationships, dorms, parties, roommates, studying, classes, etc. I remember being terrified Junior year...that seems so long ago. Their questions seemed like common sense to me (...Yes you have to study. No, there are not homework checks. Yes, there are parties during the week.) but I guess when you're a Junior in HS, college is completely foreign territory.
Two days ago I put on my "The Magical Musical of Bernie an Phil" cd that Molly made for me and went through my HS box, actually it's a trunk. It was amazing how when I opened my trunk it actually still smelled like my last HS boyfriend - weird? And then I actually started bawling in my basement. My dad came down and found me crouched over my Kairos retreat binder covered in tears (...uhhhh I had dust in my eye?) The first thing I noticed is that I am a complete pack rat. I saved everything - everything love letter (And I have an extensive collection, mostly from Andy), plastic jewelry from the tops of birthday cakes, every picture imaginable, every receipt from dinners and movie tickets....it's insane. But I really appreciate that I kept all that stuff. Not that I didn't have a HUGE urge to burn everything when I went through a breakup or a fall out - once my best friend Kristin and I actually did try to burn Scott's picture (Sorry, Scott)...we ended up setting off the fire alarm and almost lighting the carpet on fire. So I never did that again...and it might be junk, but it's my junk.
I think being at home makes me nostalgic. The midwest will do that to you....maybe it's all the fresh air.
love love love,
me
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