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Sometimes...I wish I were more of a girl. Like a girl-girl. As in 'my nail polish isn't chipped', hi-lights, I-don't-look-awkward-in-heels girl. The kind that can pull off a babydoll dress and headband without looking like a Halloween costume and doesn't shudder at the thought of pink. Just once I would like to go one day without having giant bruises on my legs and skinned knees and bike chain oil on my right calf. Or maybe actually willingly choose to go on a shopping spree on Newbury instead of Landry's bike shop or the Nike store.
It's not that I haven't tried to keep my nails unchipped for more than an hour or pretended to like spending an entire day at the mall, but honestly I find it more exhausting than doing a 6 hour century bike ride. And why would I spent $100 on a new dress I'll wear maybe once if I could buy a new set of Speedplays I'll use everyday?
I blame it on my Missouri upbringing, my brothers, and triathlons. I used to love makeovers and shopping, and now I feel it's a serious chore when I have to paint my nails or pluck my eyebrows. I think I started to come to this realization when I was at the store the other day and I picked up Cycling, Triathlon, and Running magazines instead of Cosmopolitan. And my tri-team friends consider me, "one of the guys." Andddd I was talking to my brother and he said I was the last person he would ever want to get in a fist fight with - awesome. I can't even pack a hard punch! At least I haven't tried it yet...he was supposed to pick Mike Tyson or something, not me!
On that note, my sister just walked in, picked up my pullover I just wore cycling and told me it was the most disgusting thing she's ever smelled - case and point. Girls are supposed to smell good! I want to smell good!
Also, I want people to stop squeezing my biceps and calling me "a beast." Not that THAT isn't the most endearing pet name I've ever heard or anything....
In the end I'd pick new components for the Doctor over a new pair of stilettos any day and my body may be um, "beastly" (?) but it gets me to the finish line, and that's something I can definitely be grateful for.
Still, you always want what you can't have...like a Cervelo P4... Uh, I mean, a Fendi bag.
;)

Love love love,
me

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